I realy feel like killing myself (no joke) i need sum real helpful advise?

i am 20 yrs old,live with my partner and my son 9month. me n my partner haven't been getting on too well for months now... i am the 1 that doesn't like to Talk etc...but for the past 6 month ive tried talking and talking but she neva wants to... i can do nothing right...n she argues almost every day but its stupid little things that most of time were actually her fault. but it all ends up with go i dont wanna be with you anymore. but if i was to go...she would do watever she could to make sure i didnt see my son... i dont have a job because i luck after the bby...so i dont see any money... i have no car and no where to go... i do still love her even though sumtimes i realy wanna puch her. all my family live abroad...all my friends live miles away... wat am i supposed to do?!